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Bakery Day 30: It’s all a lie!

Yesterday was the worst day since opening, and today is not so far behind. I do not want to use the words “I feel like a failure” because I know I have gone much further than most dream about, but the truth is, I do!

I got to work today at 4:30 am to make croissants ... they failed miserably. Miserably!!! I tossed the brioche because it’s no longer something I think should be sold and no one is buying the empanadas.  This afternoon I went home and tried to make croissants there and failed again. What is it I am doing wrong that was working so well just over a week ago?

There is a lot of stress as a result of business not being well and it has been spilling in to home life far too much. That makes me very sad because Sandy is such an amazing woman and I am 100% certain that without her I would not be here in the bakery, sharing my experiences with you.

Most of the time I just feel like crying. Money is going fast, many repeat customers are not returning. I have no ideas about what things to bake that people will want to buy. I have a puffed pastry idea but I suppose that will end up like the croissants so I am afraid to even try it to not waste more expensive ingredients.

All this makes me wonder.... am I a fake? A fraud? Do I even have any business running a bakery (into the ground in just one month)? Or, is this all absolutely normal and I need to ride the wave and not be stuck in what doesn’t work, instead build new bridges to what should work?

i follow a lot of professional bakers on Instagram and their works are amazing. So beautiful and professional and inviting. This is what my offerings look like today:







It’s just a joke! I mean the quality...  of yesterday was a shiiitake day, today is easily ten times worse.

If there is a positive note, most of the bread I made is sold. This means Sandy was right about the options, which doesn’t surprise me as she is much smarter than I am!

Thank you for reading

#doeverythingwithlove

ps - this is not a pity party and I am not looking for someone to stroke me on the back and say do not worry. The purpose of these posts is to share real emotions and feelings, the good and bad, and of course, ugly.

 
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